Options for Aging Parents
Nobody
wants to think about the mortality of their aging parents. Nobody wants to even
begin to think about what they’re going to do once their loving parents become
physically and mentally weakened by the aging process. The truth is that the
earlier one starts to plan about their parents’ future, the easier it will be
for the whole process.
Before
deciding to talk to your parents about their future, you might want to discuss
this issue among you and your siblings (if you have any siblings) to see who is
willing to do what (finance, taking care of them, etc). Once you have figured
out what efforts you are willing to contribute, you should start discussing the
issue with your parents. Some things to ask them would be:
- · Would you rather live in a nursing home or live at home? (some parents would rather live in a nursing home than be a burden to their children by living at home, so if you are willing to have them live at home with you, LET THEM KNOW!)
* “Fifty
million Americans currently provide the home care for an adult family member,
according to the National Alliance for Caregiving” (1). So know that you’re not
alone!
- · There is also a choice of assisted living, where a nurse or CNA comes into their home frequently and takes care of their needs
Having your
parents’ input on the matter is very important for their happiness. One of the
best compromises between nursing homes and living at home with your parents is
assisted living. Assisted living comes at a fraction of the cost of nursing
homes and this way, parents are still able to live at home where they are
comfortable. Some may say that they are willing to take on the responsibility
of their aging parents all the way, but what about your job? Or your children?
Or your spouse?
Taking care of an elder is difficult and can make people stressed and depressed. I’m not saying it is impossible to take care of an elder with a family and a job (because my parents do it with my grandma), but boy is it hard. Whenever I come home, I feel the tension between my mother and my grandmother. My grandmother has Alzheimer’s, so this makes it even more difficult for my family. Luckily, my grandmother is physically stable, but her mind often fails her in many things. The worst part about this is that somebody has to be at home at all times because my grandma has been known to get into trouble. She sometimes forgets that she leaves the stove on some occasions the stove is set on “HIGH” and the pans would be burning along with the wasted food that was in them.
Taking care of an elder is difficult and can make people stressed and depressed. I’m not saying it is impossible to take care of an elder with a family and a job (because my parents do it with my grandma), but boy is it hard. Whenever I come home, I feel the tension between my mother and my grandmother. My grandmother has Alzheimer’s, so this makes it even more difficult for my family. Luckily, my grandmother is physically stable, but her mind often fails her in many things. The worst part about this is that somebody has to be at home at all times because my grandma has been known to get into trouble. She sometimes forgets that she leaves the stove on some occasions the stove is set on “HIGH” and the pans would be burning along with the wasted food that was in them.
Below (2) is a
link to a story written by a man that had to go through the process of caring
for his aging father. It is just an example of the responsibility and heartache
that comes with taking care of an elder. I know that even thinking about your
parents becoming old and weak is depressing, but the best option anybody can do
is have a plan way before the inevitable crisis occurs.
(2)http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2010/04/letting-go-of-my-father/8001/3/
-Dagmar Velez
-Dagmar Velez
posted by carol cox @ 1:09 PM
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